Brenda and Steve took their six-year-old son to the doctor.
With some hesitation, they explained that although their little angel
appeared to be in good health, they were concerned about his rather small
After examining the child, the doctor confidently declared, "Just feed him
pancakes. That should solve the problem."
The next morning when the boy arrived at breakfast, there was a large
stack of warm pancakes in the middle of the table.
"Gee, Mom," he exclaimed. "For me?"
"Just take two," Brenda replied. "The rest are for your father."
Medicare Health Insurance in a nutshell
The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, "Hello."
"Mrs. Ward, this is Doctor Jones at the Medical Testing Laboratory.
When your doctor sent your husband's test to the lab yesterday,
results from another Mr. Ward arrived as well, and we are now uncertain
which one is your husband's. Frankly the results are either bad or terrible."
"What do you mean?" Mrs. Ward asks nervously.
"Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and
the other one tested positive for AIDS. We can't tell which on is your
"That's dreadful! Can't you do the test again?" questioned Mrs.
"Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay for these
expensive tests one time."
"Well, what am I supposed to do now?"
"The people at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband
off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his way home,
don't sleep with him."
Scottish Joke 1
The Scotsman fell in love with her at second sight. The first time he met her he didn't know she was rich.
Scottish Joke 2
The church was having trouble raising its annual budget. A member of the congregation, an electrician, came up with a great idea.
He said, "We will wire all of the seats and then, when our chairman of fund-raising asks for pledges on Sunday morning we will follow
something like the following procedure: we will ask, 'Will all those who will pledge five dollars a week please stand up?'
And then the electrician will punch the five dollars button."
They went through this procedure up to what they felt would be the maximum
limits of some to pledge. After the congregation had been dismissed, in the back row they found that the only Scottish member of the
congregation had been electrocuted!
Scottish Joke 3
The small Scottish boy said, "Dad, you promised me a pound if I was top of the class. Well, I did it!"
His father reluctantly handed over a pound note and said, "There you are, son. But don't study so hard – it's not good for you!"
Scottish Joke 4
The Scotsman had arrived home unexpectedly, and now he stared suspiciously at a cigar smouldering in an ashtray.
"Where did that cigar come from?" he thundered as his wife cowered in bed.
There was a pregnant pause. Then from the closet a shaky Scottish masculine voice said, "Cuba!"